I feel really good tonight. I have my headphones on as I’m listening to county music on the radio. And guess what?! I’m actually singing along! I never sing!! Today is the 25th of June. Hhmm that means I’ve been here officially 22, 23… 24 days! It took 24 days to finally realize… I am exactly where God wants me to be. I never thought
I’d say that, I never thought I’d feel like I am where I’m supossed to be.
The following years after high school I spent a lot of time feeling lost. I never really knew what I wanted. I thought I wanted to go to a university. Yet I let fear take a hold of me and I made a rash decision to buy a plane ticket and leave. Somehow I ended up in a small town back in my home state. I enrolled in community college and ended up making some friends along the way. I got a job at a hotel. Things were okay but I knew I could do more with my life. I wasn’t happy. I had forgiven myself for the past yet I wanted to move forward. I then moved to a city a few hours away. There was where I really found myself again. I got my own apartment, I finished my semester of college online, I found a job, I started doing yoga classes, I started going out on my own, I met some friends, I found a good church. Wait, let me write that again. That’s important. I found a good church. I found God again.
If it wasn’t for God I wouldn’t be where I am today. Like I wrote earlier, I spent a lot of time lost. And along the way I found God. I found a way to open myself up again to where I wanted to give myself to God fully. “I have called you by name; you are mine.” Isiah 43:1. I wanted to be forgiven. I wanted to have direction and a sense of purpose. God gave me that. God gives me a sense of purpose. “For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him.” Philippians 2:13. He helps me see who I really am. He helps me overcome sin. He helps keep me on His path. He also takes away for my own good. He is the God of all God’s.“Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing.” John 15:5.
I feel really grateful that I am where I am today. I know this is where God wants me. I pray for His Will not my own… And here I am. Here I am. Feeling stong.
I don’t want to complain or be miserable. I need to live my life. Like I wrote earlier, I feel good tonight. I feel good because I woke up, read my bible and journaled. I had patience today waiting for the bus. I walked today, I went to the store today, I edited my blog, I worked out today for a half hour, I took a shower… I’m alive and writing this post!
God is good. Being positive and thankful is good. Keeping busy is good. Being proud of yourself is good. Remember that. You don’t have to live lost. Find your direction. “Your word is a lamp to guide my feet and a light for my path.” Psalm 119:105.